Sing from the Heart
Earlier in the summer, I found my self in a creative slump, a flat, static stretch; feeling OK, but not great, a little down but no major depression. I’ve spent the past three years spent learning mixed media techniques and processes; I realized that now it’s time to move to the next level. Do more than arranging elements in a pleasing design on a page, or canvas.
I need to find the source of the muse and, at the same time, understand the forces that subvert creativity. Like fear. Fear is a byproduct of most journeys; who, after all, isn’t afraid of face-planting at some point. My problem is that it often takes hold before I get a good footing on the path.
I’d been producing work that I really liked, so naturally fear arrived like a beautiful, fair-weather friend. I found myself doubting - will you really stay, even if I turn out to be a lot less perfect than I’d led you to believe? Will you abandon me just as I get my hopes up?
It’s no secret that growth involves risk, but after a few weeks of numb uncertainty I felt ready for an intentional exploration of the terra-not-so-firma, deep down where the knotted quagmire of roots simmer with meaning; the source, the forces that fuel the yearning, conscious need to create, to connect with the process of making art in an intentional design. Paint from the heart according to my good friend, artist Debbie Westerfield.
In Art and Fear*, the author(s) says: “Naïve passion (the time I spent in joyful experimentation), which promotes work done in ignorance of obstacles, becomes – with courage – informed passion, which promotes work done in full acceptance of those obstacles.” I take that to mean that I’m at the courage part.
Anyone who has lived with that holding back sensation knows that sooner or later it is easier to deal with the risk than put up with the angst and unbearable weight of keeping all the doors shut. I want to collage anger, paint memory, grief and joy. So what if a few stray bags pop open along with way.
Coincidentally, or not, I’m reading Patti Digh’s Life is a Verb: 37 Days to Wake Up, Be Mindful and Live Intentionally. I’d be willing to bet that, like me, more people than not have read a stack of books about self-actualization, living authentically. I’ve gleaned useful information from them all, though it seems a bit silly to look for one’s self in a book. In reality, there are times when we need guides and Life is a Verb is one of the best I’ve come across. Life is a Verb is loaded with fabulous mixed media art images, which is what attracted me in the first place, her stories, collection of kick-butt quotes and free-writing prompts are producing more than I’d anticipated. If you haven’t heard about it, or already read it, I’d highly recommend it, whether you’re in a slump or not.
While scanning this collage, which I thankfully managed to complete (I admire the mother who can work with the kids at home during summer?!) I realized that it is infused with more meaning than I’d given myself credit for: the bird house heart, hands cradling eggs, bird flying in with a heart in tow…. cryptic still, but enough metaphor to make sense to me. And, that is why I make art, after all, for me. At this point anyway.
Comments
I love what you've said and I hope you never stop taking that risk! If the piece at the top of this post is any indication of that risk then I would say you are off to a very good start! I will be here watching and cheering you on gal! Never stop ~ it is Life!
XO Katie
Hi You are not alone, Fear it is a terrible thing. It keeps us down and we just have to let go of it.
Fear is just lies, and we just have to step on it and go on.
Your art is wonderful and you go ahead and take that next step.
Thanks for that book info. I will have to go to BN and see if they have it.
Thanks for sharing and You are in KY where there are so many wonderful artist.. I am in AL..I do not think there are too many of us here. LOL>
Katelen
beautiful!
Good luck with the artistic exploring.
wishing you continued courage & much joy in the process, too.
you can do it!!
say
yes!
I think what you have produced in this particular collage (which is also extremely beautiful) is a nice reflection of that deeper, subconscious mind. I totally get what you've produced esp. from a mother's point of view.
xoxo,
Kristin
Our old friend Fear is just another indication that we are growing and experiencing new things so why should we give him more than a passing nod. ;)